Chapter 3: On the Importance of a Good Foundation for a Woman's Figure

Chapter 3: On the Importance of Fine Undergarments to a Woman's Figure

Qiao'er had pressed down on him quite heavily; this scoundrel was long past being the spindly half-grown lad he used to be. Instead, he had been built up by countless helpings of savory pork into a broad-shouldered, thick-waisted, powerfully-built brute with bulging tendons all over his body.

Tie Xinyuan had also eaten plenty of pork, yet he remained remarkably lean, or as his mother liked to put it, he only grew cunning instead of fat.

Having tortured Tie Xinyuan to her heart's content, Qiao'er happily headed off to the workshop. She still had two sabers to finish delivering today and simply had no time to keep bickering with him.

Tie Xinyuan curled up in a chair, coughing twice. Once he finally caught his breath and saw that the room was empty, he straightened his robes, twirled his folding fan, and made his way to the western courtyard.

Rou'er was taking excellent care of Tangtang. Seeing Tangtang sprawled out lazily across the recliner, Tie Xinyuan felt it was utterly unreasonable for this young lady to come make trouble for him over a mere undergarment. Her current posture was hardly something that should be exposed to the eyes of an unrelated man.

Upon entering, he first bowed to his cousin Wang Man and said, "Elder Sister, what brings you here? Your health has always been delicate; you should be resting more. To travel out beneath the blazing sun—what would you do if you fell ill?"

Wang Man gave a light cough and replied, "It's nothing. The physician says I have a cold constitution, and getting out into the open air will do me good."

Tangtang chimed in with a sarcastic tone, "Spare me the fake concern! Li Qiao bullied that peasant woman, so how did you whitewash this mess?"

Tie Xinyuan smiled. "Brother Qiao is of a youthful disposition and lost his head for a moment, doing wrong. Naturally, we are doing our utmost to compensate the family—we gave them an ox!"

Upon hearing that Tie Xinyuan's solution to the matter was a single ox, Tangtang shrieked, "Is a woman's chastity only worth an ox? You're just using your power to bully others!"

Tie Xinyuan sat down, picked up a cup of muskmelon juice, took a sip, and set it down. There was no honey in it, leaving only a raw, vegetable-like taste.

"No power was used, nor was anyone bullied."

"None? Your family's ox is certainly quite precious!"

"What else were we supposed to do? Handle it strictly according to the statutes of the *Song Criminal Code*?

If the illicit seduction failed, Qiao'er would at most receive thirty strokes with a heavy cane across his back and be exiled two hundred li away for a year. He wouldn't even leave the Eastern Capital Circuit, so how is that any different from staying in Bianjing?

As for that woman, her crime would be far heavier. She would be stripped naked and paraded through the streets, then receive thirty strokes of the cane herself, followed by two hundred li of exile.

If their clan elder felt the woman had brought shame upon the entire family, they might even cage her and drown her in a pond.

Do you still think that compensating them with an ox is an abuse of power?

Tangtang, you've read the *Song Criminal Code* too. Back then, I loathed memorizing texts. In order to remember the laws in the book, I took plenty of beatings from our Great-Uncle. You were always the model student, so you should be quite familiar with this book, right?"

Tangtang stamped her foot. "Aside from the clauses on legal separation which favor women, which other line or chapter in that wretched book isn't meant to persecute women?

Fine, let's grant that you handled that well. Now, let's talk about the matter between the two of us. Don't even think about brushing me off with slick words.

I won't take this to the magistrates. I'm telling my grandfather directly."

Tie Xinyuan tapped his head with his fan and said with a deeply troubled expression, "That's even harsher than going to the magistrates. Tangtang, we must be reasonable, shouldn't we? It was you who invited me to your quarters to play chess that day..."

"Shut your mouth! Didn't you know to have a maid announce your arrival before stepping through the door?"

"How many times have you barged into my bedchamber unannounced? Do I not have a pageboy of my own?"

Seeing the two of them about to resume their quarrel, Wang Man quickly intervened, "Brother Yuan, just swallow your pride and apologize to Tangtang."

"Who wants an apology from a debauchee?"

"Now that's going too far! Scold me all you like, but don't drag that self-righteous scoundrel Song Yu into this to insult ordinary libertines! What business was it of Song Yu's that the original libertine had eight children with his plain-looking wife? They've been cursing the poor man for over a thousand years. And now you're helping them keep it up—isn't the original libertine being dreadfully wronged?"

Wang Man rubbed her temples and said, "You saw what you saw. They say one should not gaze upon what is improper. If you had just turned your head away, Tangtang wouldn't have been nearly this furious. Why on earth did you keep staring fixedly at her undergarment? Put yourself in any young lady's shoes—anyone would be furious."

Tie Xinyuan thought hard for a moment before answering, "That bodice happened to be embroidered with two fat black ducks, and the pattern was rather unique, so I glanced at it a little longer."

Tangtang's face instantly turned ashen. She grabbed a teapot and hurled it straight at Tie Xinyuan, roaring, "You surnamed Tie, I'll fight you to the death!"

Tie Xinyuan caught the flying teapot, placed it neatly on the table, and shouted back, "What are you hollering for? Let me finish!"

Tangtang was stunned by Tie Xinyuan's roar. Her heart ached with a mixture of grievance and anger as teardrops the size of peas welled up in her eyes, on the verge of falling.

Tie Xinyuan offered his handkerchief to Tangtang, but she snatched it and threw it far away. Ignoring her, Tie Xinyuan tapped his head with his fan and muttered to himself, "Why do humans wear clothes?"

Wang Man glared at him and snapped, "Naturally, to cover our nakedness and avoid shame."

Tie Xinyuan shook his head. "Wrong. In ancient times, before rites were established and human relationships were categorized, walking around completely naked was an everyday occurrence. People hadn't even developed a sense of shame, so how could there be any talk of covering it?"

The topics Tie Xinyuan was raising had already entered the realm of philosophy. Hailing from a scholarly family steeped in poetry and propriety, both Wang Man and Tangtang naturally grew serious; the Three Elm Hall never permitted its students to show disrespect toward learning.

"To us, the most important function of clothing is to conceal our bodies and preserve our dignity. To our ancient ancestors, however, garments had only one purpose—keeping warm."

Wang Man kept a straight face as she said, "That is a simple truth. There is no need for you to elaborate; both Tangtang and I understand it."

Tie Xinyuan continued pacing back and forth across the room, speaking as he walked. "The sense of shame is the very first genuine feeling that arose within us once we attained wisdom.

I once heard from foreigners coming from the West that when God first created man, He made a male, and later used the man's rib to fashion a woman. He then let this man and woman live in paradise. They possessed no wisdom and spent their days in Eden like beasts, utterly carefree.

Until one day, the woman accidentally ate of the fruit of wisdom, granting both the man and the woman intelligence.

The very first thing they did upon acquiring wisdom was to gather leaves and put them on. Supposedly, that is the earliest origin of the sense of shame."

Hearing Tie Xinyuan ramble on about topics entirely unrelated to her undergarment, Tangtang made several attempts to stand up and interrogate him directly, but Wang Man kept pressing her back into her chair, forcing her to listen to Tie Xinyuan's nonsense.

"The functions of clothing were continually developed by our ancestors down through the ages. Nowadays, the Emperor relies on his crown and robes to display his supreme authority. Officials rely on robes of different colors to signify the rank of their posts. Men and women also largely use clothing to crudely distinguish between the sexes. Most of the time, clothing's secondary functions have completely overshadowed its original purpose of keeping warm.

From the earliest awakening of shame to modern vanity, everything is displayed through clothing.

The reason I stared at Tangtang's undergarment is that it was the first time I had ever seen a woman's inner wear. After looking at it, I realized that you women are truly foolish—you don't even know how to improve your own intimate garments. While outer clothing has undergone countless changes over the millennia, your undergarments haven't changed a bit for centuries."

At this point, Tie Xinyuan used his fan to shield his face and peeked at Tangtang and Wang Man. He saw that both of them were deep in thought, having been successfully led astray by his line of reasoning.

Striking while the iron was hot, Tie Xinyuan cleared his throat and continued, "Clothes are meant to be worn by people. Whatever is comfortable, whatever is beautiful, and whatever accords with propriety is the right way to go.

A woman's physique differs from a man's, so naturally her attire must differ as well. As for how to design a set of undergarments that truly suits a woman's body, Rou'er actually has some rather unique ideas. You might as well ask her.

Rou'er has wanted to create a complete set of intimate wear best suited for women for a long time now. But alas, that silly girl hasn't succeeded over the past few years. The two of you are paragons among women; you ought to put your heads together, brainstorm a good method, and come up with a new style.

I guarantee that once you design a novel undergarment, it will be far more useful to you than reading eight hundred books."

Wang Man had never wanted Tangtang to go make trouble for Tie Xinyuan in the first place. In her view, Tangtang was simply picking a fight with him deliberately; even if there hadn't been this undergarment fiasco, some other incident involving shoes or the like would likely have arisen anyway.

Wang Man had been married for three years, and her husband served as an official in Yangqu. She had only returned to the capital to recuperate because of her poor health. As someone accustomed to managing a household, how could the subtle thoughts of young people escape her discerning eyes?

Tie Xinyuan's words had completely opened her eyes. If a novel and comfortable undergarment could truly be designed, it might very well turn out to be a lucrative business venture.

Therefore, she pulled Tangtang aside and quietly asked Rou'er what on earth she had managed to put together over all these years.

Rou'er dragged a rattan chest out from beneath the bed and gave a troubled look toward Tie Xinyuan, who was standing by with wide-eyed anticipation.

A hawk-like, piercing gleam flashed in Tangtang's eyes as she pointed toward the door and barked, "Get out!"

Tie Xinyuan gave two dry laughs and strolled out the door, twirling his folding fan. No sooner had he stepped outside than he heard several gasps of astonishment from within the room—presumably they had been utterly shocked by the willow-branch bone-stiffening corsets that Rou Niang had softened by roasting.

This was a moneymaking scheme Tie Xinyuan had dreamed up two years ago so that the plain-looking girls in his household could find good matches. He had only realized later that Rou'er and the others simply lacked the capacity to launch this business independently, which was why he had dragged Wang Man and Tangtang into the water today.

With the two of them taking the lead, this product would quickly flourish among the wealthy matrons whose purchasing power was the strongest. If he had relied solely on stinky girls like Rou'er—who lacked both striking looks and social standing—this business would have turned into a grand joke.

When he reached the workshop and found Qiao'er, that fellow was repeatedly thrusting a saber into a green sharkskin scabbard, testing the smoothness of the draw.

Seeing Tie Xinyuan enter, Qiao'er drew the blade, ran his thumb left and right along the edge to check if it had dulled, and asked offhandedly, "Did they manage to pin the label of lecher on you?"

Tie Xinyuan smiled. "I am no lecher to begin with; who could force such a label upon me? Rest assured, it's all been settled."

Qiao'er gave a thumbs-up. "You always have a way. I'm impressed, truly impressed."

Tie Xinyuan grinned. "Flattery sounds uniquely flavored coming from your mouth. Tell me, what's going on?"

Qiao'er sniffed and asked, "Do you remember Eighth Master Deng from the Sun Family Tavern?"

Tie Xinyuan frowned slightly. "That man is not easy to deal with."

Qiao'er chuckled with a dark laugh. "He died yesterday. All the tendons and bones in his limbs were shattered, and he was stabbed five times straight through the chest and abdomen. Each wound parted the flesh just enough to expose his internal organs—his heart, liver, spleen, lungs, and kidneys were all laid bare under the bright sun." (To be continued.)