Chapter 65: A Grave Misunderstanding

By the time he finished transferring money to Yao Dajun and handling all his affairs, it was already nearly four in the afternoon when Huang Guolun arrived at the northern villa.

He first went to the main hall to greet the elders.

Afterward, unable to contain his eagerness, Huang Guolun hurried to the backyard to find Huang Tao, who was playing with Dudu.

But before he could reach them, Tao’s great-grandmother stopped him.

“Er Lun, these past two days, little Tao keeps asking for a new mother. Don’t you think it’s time to hurry up? You’re still young—you can’t stay single forever. You really ought to find someone soon.”

Normally, great-grandmother wouldn’t bring up such matters with Huang Guolun, but perhaps she’d been provoked by Huang Tao over the weekend, and so she brought up these old, familiar topics.

Tao’s great-grandfather, lying leisurely on a wicker chair, rolling walnuts in his palm, rarely spoke. But when he heard the old lady mention this subject, he too turned his gaze to Huang Guolun with interest.

Huang Guolun patiently replied, “You’re right, Grandma. I’ve been searching all along. I want to find Tao a new mother as soon as possible.”

Old Mrs. Zhou handed him a peeled apple and asked, “The last time you went on a blind date with that girl who runs a café, was it not a good match?”

Taking a bite of the apple, Huang Guolun said, “She wasn’t really looking to get into a relationship, let alone marry—she agreed to the date just to satisfy her family. She’s a good person, but we’re not right for each other.”

“If it’s not a good match, then so be it. I’ll have your Aunt Li set up another introduction for you. She mentioned before that there’s a woman at the Patent Office with a doctorate, excellent in every respect. Her family also wants her to meet someone. Find some time to meet her.”

“A woman with a doctorate?” Huang Guolun’s tone was lightly teasing.

Old Mrs. Zhou shot him a look. “What? Are you prejudiced against women with doctorates? Aunt Li said she’s very pretty, has a solid job, and comes from a good family—she’s just a bit older, the same age as you, maybe two months older.”

“If her qualifications are that good and she’s still unmarried at her age, her standards must be sky-high. I can’t handle that. Please, don’t let Aunt Li introduce someone like that to me.”

Huang Guolun spoke honestly—he could barely keep up with Huang Tao alone and really didn’t want to find a woman with such high standards.

He also didn’t want to pursue a near-perfect goddess.

A woman whose conditions are too excellent needs to be cherished like a treasure—like Chen Jia, for instance.

He could barely focus on cherishing Tao; he had no energy left to cherish another goddess.

He just wanted someone pleasant to look at, gentle and kind, with a touch of artistic temperament—a good, ordinary woman.

Old Mrs. Zhou looked at him with disdain. “You haven’t even met her, why are you so timid? Just meet and chat—what if you two actually get along? She’s thirty already, surely she’s eager to marry, and you’re eager to remarry. You both want the same thing, so there’s a foundation to discuss further.”

Huang Guolun muttered, “Perhaps there’s a foundation, but I don’t think there’s any need.”

Old Mrs. Zhou glared. “Hey? Why are you so stubborn? Meeting her won’t cost you anything. What if she’s a good fit?”

“There’s no ‘what if.’ If you really want Aunt Li to introduce someone, let it be someone more down-to-earth, not a female elite. They’re not my type.”

Seeing that Old Mrs. Zhou was about to pester him further, Huang Guolun quickly excused himself, “Grandpa, Grandma, you two sit and rest. I’m going to check on Tao.”

Hiding a cone behind his back, he hurried off to the backyard.

On the neatly trimmed lawn, Huang Tao was pulling on a toy accordion, singing Shao Yibei’s version of “McDull the Brave” to Dudu:

“I really, really want to nibble your face,
Your eye circles are born chocolate,
I really, really want to pick at your toes,
Kick, kick, kick, la la la la la…”

Huang Tao’s singing was adorably childish, but Dudu found it utterly alarming!

This rascal actually wants to nibble my face? Now’s the time to run if ever there was one!

Dudu wiggled his bottom, trying to escape Huang Tao.

But Huang Tao wouldn’t give up, chasing after Dudu while singing:

“Dang dang dang dang, dang dang dang dang

After I’m full, I laugh ha ha, ha ha ha (burp)
Dang dang dang dang, dang dang dang dang
Only as a monk on Wudang Mountain would my mom love me…”

Huang Guolun was nearly in stitches from laughter. This kid was like a little parrot, imitating everything perfectly. He even reproduced Shao Yibei’s signature belch in the song—his memory was astonishing!

What surprised Huang Guolun even more was that the melody Huang Tao played on the accordion was actually accurate and harmonized with his singing, not just random noise.

Guolun had previously taught Huang Tao to play the gong, drums, even the ukulele, and had tried teaching him piano.

Huang Tao was a quick learner, able to pick up any instrument after just a few tries, but as soon as he got the hang of it, he’d lose interest.

His only motivation for learning music was the promise of treats like ice cream cones.

As soon as he got his reward, he’d put the instrument aside.

If his enthusiasm for food was 100, his interest in instruments was only 1.

Yet, even with so little practice, Huang Tao was more adept at instruments than most four-year-olds—he could make music with anything.

Guolun had never taught him to play the accordion, yet this new toy—who knew who had bought it—was being played with surprising skill, rhythm and flair, all self-taught.

A premonition grew ever stronger in Guolun’s heart: this boy might well be a musical prodigy like Gawad.

If Huang Tao truly had such innate talent, he would make sure to guide his son down the right path to musical greatness.

Huang Tao hadn’t noticed his father’s arrival and, back turned, continued singing to Dudu while playing the accordion:

“I really, really want a blueberry tart,
Fish balls and noodles, noodles, noodles, mia,
I really, really want to kick a winning goal,
Pia pia pia, wahaha, la la la la…”

At this part, he treated Dudu like a soccer ball, aiming a powerful kick at him, frightening Dudu so much he almost leapt over the fence.

Unable to watch any longer, Guolun laughed and called out, “Settle down, kid! Stop bullying Dudu—he’s your elder brother!”

“He’s my brother?”

As if someone had flipped a switch, Huang Tao immediately stopped singing and playing, turning to Guolun with a familiar look of deep contemplation.

Guolun knew trouble was brewing and quickly tried to divert him. “Don’t let your imagination run wild—he’s not my or your mother’s child!”

“So… if he’s not your and Mom’s child, then… is he your and his mom’s child?”

Guolun was nearly on his knees with despair.

“Wait, did I just uncover some huge secret?” Seeing his father’s speechless agony, Huang Tao was astonished.

“Get lost!” Guolun snapped.

Obediently, Huang Tao rolled on the grass, then with a cheeky grin, got up to chase after Dudu again.

“I didn’t say roll in a straight line! Get back here! It’s been two days since you’ve seen me—don’t you miss your dad?”

“Of course I do!” Huang Tao scampered over, eyes shining with affection. “Dad, I missed you so, so much!”

Guolun, feeling a little guilty, rubbed his chin and asked, “Is there a special reason you missed me so much?”

“Of course!” Huang Tao puffed out his little chest. “I want to be a child star! Dad, let me be a child star! All the uncles and aunties who visited lately said I’m perfect for it! Even Grandpa says I’m a born performer! And my great-uncle told me if I become a child star, I’ll get to eat my way around the world!”

Hearing that his older brother had put such ideas into Tao’s head, Guolun declared, “Don’t listen to your great-uncle! Being a child star won’t let you eat your way around the world—instead, you’ll be bothered by the whole world, wherever you go.”

Huang Tao frowned, confused.

“If you become a child star, you won’t be able to go out and play whenever you want—not even to the kids’ world. You won’t be able to eat at any restaurant you like, or go to the amusement park.”

“Why not?” Tao was baffled.

“Don’t you see how every time a star goes out, crowds of fans gather around them, and paparazzi snap their photos? If you’re in a hurry to pee and want to water the roadside grass, you can’t—even that will draw everyone’s attention. Everything you do will be under the public eye. Do you understand how annoying that is? No big star can just go shopping whenever they want. Once you’re famous, the troubles are endless!”

Huang Tao searched his memory for entertainment news and muttered, “That does make sense… but I’m not afraid of being in the spotlight. I’m not afraid if people see me watering the flowers when I have to pee—”

“Stop right there!” Guolun cut off his wild imagination. “You might not mind being noticed, but your sister Baiyao would! Don’t forget, she’s the Snow Witch—you’re her best friend, right? If everyone notices you, her identity could be exposed too. Don’t you remember ‘The Witch’s Code’? What happens if a witch’s identity is widely revealed?”

Huang Tao lowered his head and whispered, “She’ll be punished and have to leave this world.”

“As long as you remember.” Guolun towered over his son, playing up the threat. “You’re only thinking about yourself—what about your sister Baiyao? She’s a noble Snow Witch! There will always be delicious food, and you’ll always find a way to eat it, but there’s only one Snow Witch in the world—your sister Baiyao. If she’s gone, there will be no more magic, no more fairy tales. Can’t you tell what’s more important?”

Huang Tao’s little dream of stardom was once again suppressed by the weight of Baiyao’s secret.

Pouting unhappily, he conceded for once, “Alright, for Baiyao’s sake, I won’t become a child star—at least for now. But you have to promise to buy me all the delicious food in the world!”

“As long as you behave, you’ll never lack for treats,” Guolun laughed, pinching his son’s chubby cheek.

“Words are wind—give me an ice cream as proof.”

“Knew you’d say that. Here you go, your reward.”

Like performing a magic trick, Guolun produced a cone from behind his back and held it out.

Huang Tao was immediately delighted, forgetting all his unattainable worries.

“Dad, you’re the best!”

With the ice cream in hand, Tao’s words became as sweet as the treat.

Guolun smiled contentedly. “When you grow up, you’ll remember Dad’s kindness, right? You’ll be as good to me as I am to you?”

Tao vowed, “Don’t worry, Dad. When I grow up, as long as I have meat, you’ll have bones to gnaw on.”

Guolun’s good mood darkened at once—he almost saw stars before his eyes.

Fearing Tao would overthink things, he quickly added, “Dudu was born to his own mother and father—it has nothing to do with me.”

Huang Tao patted his father’s arm comfortingly, “I understand, Dad. I won’t tell anyone your secret. I finally know why you call Dudu your son, too.”

“There’s no secret! Don’t go imagining things! Dudu was born to his dog mom and dog dad, not me and his mom!”

“What are you doing, talking like that in front of the child? Watch your language—don’t keep saying ‘his mom’ and ‘his mom’ like that!” Old Mrs. Zhou had just walked into the backyard, catching Guolun scolding Tao.

“I… I… can’t take this anymore!” Guolun was so flustered he could hardly speak. He swore never again to call Dudu his son in front of Huang Tao.

This kind of misunderstanding… was just too much!