Chapter 37: Integrity or Otherwise

The matter of feigning illness should be handled sooner rather than later. To ensure the performance was convincing, Pei Yanzhou even sent for a physician to the General’s Mansion, paying him five taels of silver to declare that Madam Liang was suffering from extreme agitation caused by suppressed anger, even going so far as to have a prescription written out.

Liang Shanru was truly taken aback when she discovered what he was up to, and she hurried to ask Madam Liang about it.

Madam Liang, however, merely remarked that it was only right—they could not let the Li family off so easily—and told her not to worry about it. She then dismissed Pei Yanzhou, sending him off with Pei Jingxing to the Li family to demand an explanation.

As Liang Shanru thought of the tasks she had assigned to Nongyun, she felt a sense of unease.

Noticing her troubled state, Madam Liang waved for the maidservants in the room to withdraw. She took Liang Shanru’s hand and asked earnestly, "Are you keeping something from me?"

Liang Shanru bit her lip, momentarily speechless.

She had never intended for her aunt to know—not because she feared her aunt would think her calculating or underhanded, but because she felt it unnecessary. She had her own ways of venting her frustrations. Just as she had told Zhou Shen when he offered her money, no one could stay by her side forever; sooner or later, she would have to rely on herself. Since she had taken charge of her own affairs, she felt she did not need to account for them to anyone, even to the elders who loved her.

Yet, at this moment, she hesitated.

Seeing her silence, Madam Liang knew she was indeed hiding something. She frowned, "Shanru, whatever you have done, tell me truthfully. I will not be angry with you."

Her expression was grave. After a moment, she added, "It is not that I forbid you from making your own decisions, but you must not leave any loose ends. Whether now or in the future, the principle remains the same for me as it does for anyone else. If you can act flawlessly, leaving no trace behind, that is a sign of your capability. If you cannot, it only shows you are still inexperienced. Should a mess arise, I would have to find a way to cover for you. Therefore, Shanru, you must not hide things from me."

The guidance of an elder, offered in the face of unknown secrets, was not a reprimand, but a sign of sincere concern and worry.

Liang Shanru’s nose tingled with soreness. Calling out to her aunt in a muffled voice, she recounted everything she had orchestrated, word for word.

Madam Liang’s expression relaxed. "And here I thought it was something serious."

She raised a hand to stroke the top of Liang Shanru’s head, her movements gentle. Soon, she sighed, "No wonder."

Liang Shanru did not understand and asked, "What do you mean, Aunt?"

"That boy, Yanzhou," Madam Liang took a deep breath and pulled her to sit beside her. "When he came earlier, he said he wanted to ask for our opinion. Now that I think about it, he must have run into you while you were giving instructions to Nongyun. He realized you were too incensed to let it go, which is why he came to tell me all that."

Liang Shanru lowered her eyes. Seeing this, Madam Liang asked, "Why aren’t you happy? Is it because of Yanzhou’s uninvited kindness?"

Pei Yanzhou’s actions had indeed helped her, and to speak the truth would only make her seem ungrateful. Muttering, Liang Shanru said, "No, I am not unhappy. I just didn't expect him to go to such lengths."

Madam Liang was pleased to hear this. "What of it? They bullied us, so naturally, he should help his own kin."

"But Aunt, wouldn't you think my actions were not entirely honorable?" This was the question Liang Shanru truly wanted to ask.

Reputation was an external thing; she did not care for it. Having lived two lifetimes, she understood that nothing was more important than survival. But how her aunt viewed her—that, she could not ignore.

Anxiety welled up in Liang Shanru’s heart. "I told you I didn't care, yet behind your back, I arranged for these things to be done. Do you think my methods are dark and unseemly?"

She was, after all, still young and had never done such things before.

Madam Liang’s heart softened completely. She had thought that because Liang Shanru had plotted for her earlier, she had grown up, but it seemed that was not the case.

Madam Liang squeezed her palm. "Weren't you afraid I would be angry before you did it?"

"I was just very angry when I did it," Liang Shanru replied frankly. "I have done nothing wrong; I should not have been slandered by these people. Furthermore, when Madam Li came to you and made you so angry, I was even more furious."

Madam Liang gave an 'oh' sound. "Then I was right; you truly do act without considering the consequences."

Liang Shanru pressed her lips together and remained silent.

Madam Liang continued, "I am not angry, nor do I think you are unseemly. Look at Yanzhou’s actions—did he not collude with me to lie and use his status to bully others at their doorstep? No one is entirely pure and upright for their whole life; everyone has their own self-interests. I am simply curious: how did you come to know so much about the Li family?"

In truth, she felt her young niece was becoming somewhat inscrutable.

She certainly could not be called simple or innocent, but if she truly possessed such ability—to grasp even the secret affairs of the Li household—how then had she been manipulated by the Zhou family for so many years? Madam Liang was truly puzzled.

Liang Shanru pouted. "That is thanks to Jingyi," she explained, then continued, "The Marquis of Changle and his wife have been pressuring me to marry Li Liulang for some time. As soon as they mentioned it, I told Jingyi. At that time, we were always discussing it, and she helped me inquire about many things regarding the Li family."

"It was mostly because Li Liulang has a notorious reputation. Jingyi kept saying that a family capable of raising such a child could not be a good one, and there were likely many sordid secrets hidden within. She suggested I should hold onto some leverage, just in case the Marquis of Changle really pushed me too far, so I would have something to protect myself with. As for how she found out, I didn't ask in detail."

A look of realization flickered in Madam Liang’s eyes. "Jingyi is truly devoted to you."

Speaking of Xu Jingyi, she felt a sense of regret. "Once we go to the capital, who knows when we will see her again? We should have spent more time with her while we were still in Yangzhou, but with the matters of the Liang family unfinished, you have been busy."

As she spoke, she sighed, "Find time to see her more often. Once we are settled in Shengjing, if she has the time, we can invite her to stay in the capital for a while."

Yet, young women would eventually marry, and once wed, they would be occupied with their husbands and children. By then, if they were separated by distance, meeting would be as difficult as ascending to heaven.

Liang Shanru said she understood. "I thought so too. When I went to the Xu residence this morning, I told her I would be leaving for the capital soon. Jingyi... she was very reluctant, but she knew I had to go. She held onto me for a long time talking. Even if I don't go to see her, she will certainly come to find me."

Madam Liang nodded. "So, what kind of things are going on in the Li family? Have you managed to get a hold of their dirty secrets?"

Liang Shanru’s eyelid twitched.

Her dear aunt had loved to gossip about others' secrets since she was young; even when her mother was alive, she had mentioned it many times. She had assumed that after years of marriage and reaching this age, her aunt would have outgrown it, but it seemed that was not the case.

Liang Shanru offered a sheepish smile. "They are all sordid affairs that I cannot bring myself to speak of. Perhaps you could send a servant to inquire outside? I have already arranged it; the beggars in the city are the fastest at spreading such news. Within a quarter of an hour of the silver changing hands, the whole city will know. If you send someone to ask, I guarantee they will find out exactly what is going on, so please, do not ask me."