Chapter 14: Is It Worth It?

Inside the carriage, the three sat with bowed heads, silent. Matthew’s hand trembled as if he wanted to pull something from his white coat. After searching for a while and finding nothing, he suddenly recalled that he was wearing the coat itself. He fumbled beneath the seat and quickly found a crumpled pack of soft cigarettes. He pulled one out and placed it between his lips. Then he produced a windproof lighter from his pocket, one that looked somewhat like a ZIPPO. He flicked it several times but failed to kindle a flame.

The young nurse nearby had eyes red from crying softly. Judging by their expressions, it seemed they both cared deeply for her—or perhaps for those left behind there. For a moment, the carriage was thick with a heavy, oppressive atmosphere.

Robin felt numb. This was the second time someone had died trying to save him. The first was the owner of the bloodstained letter in his backpack, a letter he had yet to open—not because he forgot, but because he dared not. He couldn’t face its sender or the letter itself, especially amid enemy lines where opening it might shatter his composure entirely.

Though Robin’s intellect had regressed to that of a child during his months as a soldier, he remembered everything. The scene of that soldier brother taking a bullet for him haunted his nightmares, replaying endlessly in his mind these past days. This was why Robin struggled to sleep and needed sedatives.

Now, because of his own plans, yet another life had been traded for his. The previous death was passive; this one was active. He had never intended to cause anyone’s death. He had assumed a powerful supernatural being would storm in, forcibly extract or steal him away—after all, this was a world of the extraordinary. Or perhaps, like in TV dramas, a secret agent like Yan Shuangying or a covert rescue team would silently whisk him away.

He never imagined the rescue would come at the cost of a life.

Having died once himself, Robin cherished his life deeply, but he never wished to exchange his survival for another’s death.

“Hello, Robin Rommel.” Matthew took two puffs from his cigarette, his demeanor steadying. He extended a hand toward Robin. “Allow me to introduce myself—Matthew Davis, the one responsible for your rescue this time.”

“Why save me in such a manner?” Robin did not take his hand, staring fixedly at the floor. “Is it meaningful to trade life for life?”

Silence enveloped them. Matthew remained quiet for a full ten seconds before speaking.

“Listen, Robin.” He handed Robin a cigarette. “This is war. People are meant to die!”

“We never expected that your rescue would encounter such an accident.”

Robin refused the cigarette and continued in a low voice, “If there wasn’t absolute certainty, wouldn’t it have been better not to act for now? You all…”

Before Robin could finish, Matthew suddenly sprang up, grabbing Robin by the collar and slamming him against the carriage wall.

Thud!

The dull sound, accompanied by the steam engine’s roar, cut off Robin’s words.

“There’s no perfect plan in this world. If we had moved slower, you would already be dead!” Matthew stared intently at Robin. “You are the Silver Wing Assassin on the battlefield—the enemy’s nightmare. Your life shouldn’t end here.”

“I’m not supposed to die, but should the ones who saved me die instead?”

Robin’s eyes reddened.

Many heroes who save others are met not with gratitude but with criticism—some are vilified for their rescue methods, others lose their lives and receive only cold remarks like ‘I never asked them to save.’ But Robin was not heartless.

The soldier brother’s death had become his nightmare; he did not want others to sacrifice themselves for him.

As he spoke, Robin felt a pang of guilt.

I should have known. I should have realized rescuing me from enemy lines wouldn’t be so easy; I should have anticipated sacrifices... I was only thinking about survival, imagining the best-case scenario and never the worst. Ultimately, I was too selfish.

“Let me put it another way—have you ever truly admired someone from your heart?”

“Yes.”

Images of countless heroes who had sacrificed themselves for national revival flashed through Robin’s mind.

“Knowing there’s no absolute certainty and the high chance of death, if you were asked to save such a person, would you?”

“I would!”

If it were to save those heroes, Robin would unquestionably step forward. His single-handed defense against seven men to protect his female superior was proof of his sincerity; he was a man of passion.

“But if the person you save becomes despondent because of those who died for him, does that honor the dead?”

“But what if that person isn’t worth saving?” Robin murmured.

Had I known this would be the outcome, I would have focused on Jennifer... At least I wouldn’t have dragged so many people down.

“Whether someone is worth saving is never defined by the saved but by the saviors. If we believe it’s worth it, that’s enough! Your gun has slain countless enemies on the battlefield—we can’t do that! Your gun helped free Volsini City from the clutches of Marquis Sid earlier—we couldn’t!”

“Robin, none of us want accidents. The Grand Duke’s decision to deploy us means in his heart, you are more important than any of us.” Seeing Robin’s guilt, Matthew felt relieved—this time, they truly rescued a hero, not a scoundrel.

Saving such a person meant the deaths were not in vain.

However, at this point, it was crucial to guide this hero correctly, to prevent him from drowning in self-blame.

Matthew had seen too many promising talents destroy themselves out of guilt.

Robin gave a bitter smile. “What you see is just the image from reports. Do you really know who I am? I’m a selfish man!”

“Does it matter who you are?” Matthew dismissed Robin’s words. “The orders come from the Grand Duke; I’m the one who planned the rescue!”

True selfish people never admit to being selfish nor feel guilt.

“It’s my problem that people died, not yours.” Matthew interrupted. “Our plan originally didn’t expect any casualties. You were supposed to be extracted safely.”

“No one anticipated that at that moment, two unexpected people would appear.”

“They saw you and immediately threw a grenade.”

“Looks like they intended to kill you!”

“I’m glad you made the right choice then. If you hadn’t trusted us and instead believed that woman, our mission would have failed utterly.”

Who was that woman? If she belonged to the Grand Duke’s side, she wouldn’t want to kill him. If she worked for Marquis Sid... she wouldn’t kill him either.

“I know who they are,” Robin answered Matthew’s unspoken question. “They’re from the Roland Studio of the Delos Empire. They tried to kill me to silence me! I didn’t know they would come; I didn’t expect you to encounter them…”

Robin had never intended to hide this crucial information. Concealing it might endanger everyone, especially since Matthew and his team suffered heavy losses precisely due to unequal intelligence.

Besides, there was nothing to hide. Robin was rescued from a black factory, and his identification was handed in when he enlisted. His being from Delos was just something that couldn’t be revealed to the media or public for the time being.

“Silencing?” Matthew’s pupils contracted as he stared sharply at Robin. “Wait, why is the Delos Empire involved?”

Matthew had remained calm, patiently consoling Robin even when he called himself selfish. But the mention of foreign nations changed his expression.

Those men looked professional and had chosen the same timing, which led to the clash.

In the end, they were Delos agents?

A mere art studio fielding a squad of gunmen and supernaturals? What were they after?

“I’m from Delos, sent here on assignment. I didn’t expect to end up in a company conducting human experiments. They used me for hypnosis experiments, which damaged my mind.”

“Then, inexplicably, I was rescued by the Grand Duke’s people. I was dazed and incoherent, not even knowing how I became a soldier.”

“It wasn’t until I was shot here that my mind cleared.”

Robin pointed to the wound on his abdomen, which was bleeding again. “My last memory is falling on the battlefield as reinforcements and medics arrived—I don’t even know how I got captured.”

Matthew’s head buzzed; the situation was more complex than he had imagined.

He had thought the mission was to rescue a war hero, not that it would involve the Delos Empire.

“Listen, Robin, no matter where you’re from, you are now a soldier of the Grand Duke. Before sending us to rescue you, he must have known the truth!” Matthew urged. “You must understand who your real enemies are!”

“It’s not those people; your mind wouldn’t be damaged.”

“It’s not them causing trouble; our men wouldn’t have died.”

“Our men didn’t die because of you; they died because of those others!”

“Instead of blaming yourself, you should think about how to avenge those who died for you!”

Robin suddenly awakened to the truth.

Yes, it wasn’t me or Matthew at fault—it was those from the Roland Studio!

The Roland Studio, huh?

I was just a pawn, instinctively ignoring that these people wanted me dead.

They killed Frest once and now want to eliminate me too?

As long as I live to get out, I will settle the score with them!

Just then, steam whistles echoed throughout the city.

An alarm!